I'm leaving soon.

So things aren't going so well for me.
I cant seem to do anything right and my selfesteem is LOW.
So the only thing I can think of is to make things better.
I cannot sit around and wait for a miracle to happen and make my life better.
I was talking to my co-worker Shelby about trying to get a ticket to London.
We started to talk about prices then I started to ask to borrow 50 bucks.
I was only kind of kidding, but then she told me she would buy me a plane ticket.
Odd, yes?
Well she said "I'm in debt because of shittier people, I am able to help you and I trust that you wont jipp me like the other losers have"
So I told I for sure would have to pay her back.
So I have been looking online for plane tickets.
Expedia has this one flight that is 766.45 for a 2 stop flight.
The first stop would be in Chicago, the other direction of London.
The second Warsaw Poland. Way past London.
Then final stop in London.
Orbitz has a more expensive flight with one stop in Toronto.
Then there is the how to get to Atlanta.
A bus ticket is 25 bucks so I can cover it, but I'm afraid that when I get to the airport they will need Shelby to pick the ticket up.
I dunno how this works and I would hate for her to have to go to Atlanta with me.
She is already doing more than she should.

So should I take her help or should I try to save up myself?
I dont mind paying her back!
And I cant help think of the pain my Mom would be in.
Of course she isnt the reason why I want to go, but I know she will think she is.

Then there is the being homeless in London bit that scares me.
I would live in a shelter and try to get a work visa.
The whole point of moving there is to better myself.
Maybe being homeless will spark the grown up in me.
Maybe it will make me more driven to do what it takes to be successful.

I think this is a good thing. Its covered in dispair and a black cloud but I know the end result will be just what I need.

Ciao bellas!